#kakinota : What I Know For Sure - Oprah Winfrey

"What exactly do you know for sure?"

"If this is the last day of your life, would you spend it the way you're spending today?"

That were the questions Oprah asked her readers at the beginning of the book.

How do we answer them?

Do we need to take time and think about it?

Or....

Do we answer them spontaneously?

The book is actually a compilations from her monthly column in O Magazine.

It told us about her life experiences - her joy and pain, her ups and downs and people she met in her life  -  world famous, richest, powerful or just ordinary people.

Oprah wrote about what are the most important factors in her life and how we can learn from them :

1. Joy -  Oprah believed that every day brings a chance for us to live the life as we want. We can either waltz boldly onto the stage of our life and be happy about it or we can sit quietly aside receding into the shadow of fear and self-doubt. The choice is ours. Choose WISELY.

2. Resilience - We have our own life journey. We are each responsible for it. When we feel the earth moving, bring ourselves back to the NOW. Remember.... we still breathing. We still alive. We survived. In this moment (NOW), we 're just need to find a way to step onto higher ground. We'll handle whatever shake up the next moment brings when we get to it. Be PRESENT.

3. Connection - It is a basic human need. We crave for it. Through connection we get love. But the most basic love we can give to ourselves is love and respect to our own self - sincerely. When we are able to do that, we will have our peace of mind and soul. And in return our soul will be able to give love to other as well. Appreciate OURSELVES.

4. Communication - It is a key factor in any relationships. A lot of bad and broken relationships are due to bad communications. And a lot of good things happen too when we are able to communicate clearly to one another. Take time to truly listen without judgement and give enough time to wait for an answer. HONESTY and SINCERITY will go a long way.

5. Gratitude - A feeling of gratitude can transform us from a negative person to an optimistic individual. Oprah writes 5 things she was grateful for on daily basis especially in the morning. It is a good habit that we need to instil into our hectic life. A dose of positive affirmations before starting our daily routine is like a simple healthy morning breakfast to our soul. What a simple healthy breakfast can do to our body is the same happen to our souls. We feel energize. We feel we can conquer whatever obstacles we're going to face that day. And our soul feel free and happy too. Feel the BLESSED.

6. Possibility -  The biggest thrill we can ever achieve is to live the life of our dreams. When we get the chance, go for it. Open ourselves to as many possibilities as we can. Who knowns maybe one of them can lead us to living the life we dream of. The true meaning of courage is to get back on track every time we stumble and fall.To be afraid and then with knees knocking and shaking, we step forward anyway- one small baby step a time. Oprah remind us to dream very big dreams, to work very very hard and after we've done everything that needs to be done then we pray. In GOD we trust.

7. Awe - Every day holds with it the possibility of seeing the world with awe and wonder. A miracle is seeing the world with light in our eyes. It is acknowledging there's always hope and possibility where none seems to exist. Many people are so closed to miracles that even when one boldly staring at them in the face, they label it coincidence. Miracles  often involve the simplest things in life. Open our eyes and heart and we'll begin to see them. Be ALERT.

8. Clarity - We need to evaluate all requests before we commit ourselves to something that we have no passion or interest of. Be selective. Focus on what matter to us most rather than worrying about pleasing others. We cannot give in just to make them like us. Even we dislike certain people in our life no matter how good they are. We need to STOP and TAKE A LOOK at our own needs. Let go the things that beyond us. Go mindless. Think of nothing. Let our mind be free and go wondering. Remind ourselves that THIS very moment is the only one you know you have for sure. Know THY SELF.

9. Power - We have the power to be what we want to be. We have the power over our mind and soul. We have the power to transform ourselves from pettiness to optimism. To be excellent is to always doing or giving our personal best. If we want the best world has to offer, we need to offer and give our best to the world first. I personally believed "What goes around comes around" while Oprah believe "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." . We can't get excellent inputs if we keep give the world our bad outputs. Karma doesn't work that way. World doesn't work that way too whether we like it or not. Be FAIR.

I think this is a wonderful way to close this year chapter of my life and welcoming the new year with a healthy dose of positive affirmations from Oprah -  no less . It makes me feel how blessed and lucky I am just to be ALIVE and HEALTHY.

So....

"What do I know for sure?"

I know for sure - whatever happen next year, I thank GOD for the past experiences I've gone through. I treasured them - the good and the bad. I pray GOD will give me good HEALTH, lots of LOVE to give to my loved ones and the STRENGTH to pick myself up and move forward.


HAPPY NEW YEAR 2015.


                           

                         

                                 10/10

#kakinota : Ingenius by Tina Seelig

A Crash Course on Creativity.

Ms Seelig taught a course on creativity and innovation (d.school) at Stanford University.

Ingenious derived from Latin term - INGENIUM which means natural capacity or innate talent.

Our brains are built for solving problems creatively.

As a kid, we loved experimenting and exploring our surroundings. We be in the PRESENT. It helps expand our creativity, competency and confidence.

As we approached adulthood, we were taught to plan and prepare for the future, to be productive, to work hard and be serious.

We shut down our natural curiosity and creativity as we strive to deliver what is expected of us.

We give up playing. We focus on producing.

We trade our rich imagination with implementation.

We change our attitude. Our creative aptitude withers.

We learn to judge. We dismiss new ideas.

Creativity allows us to thrive in an ever changing world and unlocks a universe of possibilities.

Creativity is at the heart of invention.

With enhance creativity, instead of problems, we see potential. Instead of obstacles, we see opportunity.

Ideas are free. Ideas are amazingly valuable if we know how to find them creatively.

We just need to change our perspective to find new ideas without even moving our own feet.

Only by shifting our view even a little, we change our images. We see the world at a different angle which in return adjust our perspective and the way we look at it.

We are creating frames for what we see, hear and experience all day long. Those frames both inform and limit the way we think.

In some cases, we totally forget the frames and ASSUME we're looking with the proper set of lenses.

Ability to question and shift our frames are important key to enhance our imaginations because it reveals completely different insight.

The simple process of asking 'WHY?' question provides an incredibly useful tool for expanding the platform of solution for problems.

Ms Seelig explained about Innovation Engine which inter related to each other :

3 part of inside
- Knowledge ( provide fuel for imagination)

- Imagination (catalyst for transformation of knowledge into new ideas).

- Attitude (spark that set innovation engine in motion).

3 part of outside
- Resources ( assets in our community)

- Habitat (local environment)

- Culture (beliefs, values and behaviours in the community).

                     

What interest me most is the One- Word exam conducted at Oxford University to their students.

The students were give one word (any word such as SIMPLE) and were given 3 hours to craft an essay. The beauty part of it is there is no right answers to this exam.

It was done to know more about participants' wealth of knowledge and ability to generate creative connection.

It reinforces that everything - EVERY SINGLE WORD - provide an opportunity to leverage what we know to stretch.our imagination.

Educators and parents should try to implement this wonderful creative exam into our education system at the early stages of schooling.

Because the younger minds are curious and explorative. They can't sit still. They love to try new things and not afraid to make mistakes.

Using their favourite weapon ..........

"WHY?"

They explore their limitless imaginations.

       
                                   10/10

                     

#kakinota : the color purple by alice walker

It is a story about 2 sisters - Celie and Nettie.

Celie was sexually abused at the age of 14 by her so called father.

She delivered 2 babies - a boy and a girl which was given away by her Pa.

When she turned 20 years old, her Pa married her to Mr ??? in exchange of Nettie.

Mr ??? abused her through out their marriage. Her stepchilden disrespect her.

She have to look after her husband mistress, Shug Avery, a well known singer. But she did with a happy heart.

It turned out to be blessing in disgust as after a while, Celie and Shug fast becoming best friend. Even though Shug having affair with Mr??? aka Albert, Shug told Celie that she will never marry Albert because he is weak. So weak that not only he couldn't stand up for Shug, he couldn't even stand up for himself. She taught Nellie how to be a strong woman.

When they found out the truth about Nettie, Celie was so angry with Mr ???. She think about murdering him. Shug stopped her and told Celie what she's going to do. Shug told Albert her plan which included Celie and despite his protest, he let her go.

Celie's life was getting better and better. She was able to fend for herself for the first time without Shug's help and finally they went their own separate ways.

Meanwhile, after Nettie moved out from their family home, she stay with Celie for a while before she was thrown out by Mr ??? for being stubborn. Her last word to her beloved sister, Celie - Be Strong.

She joined a missionary to Africa. Through out her journey, she wrote to Celie. She wrote explaining what Mr ??? did to her . She wrote about her journey. She wrote about finding the truth about their parents. She wrote about finally meeting Celie's children that were given away. She wrote about her family. She wrote if they will ever meet again. She wrote asking if Celie is still alive or whether Celie did received all her letters. She wrote nevertheless...  and hope.


                                     

                                     8/10

#kakinota : the one minute entreprenuer by ken blanchard

The book explained about relationship, bonding, touching....

People with people...

Everywhere...

Anywhere...

In any situations...

Savvy?

Actually, it is a very simple yet a straight forward book about how people work best with other people.

And to make reading more interesting, it combined facts and a story.

It is about A One Minute Manager explained to a young man how to be an effective manager.

Even though, the story is about managing people in an organization but generally the knowledge can be applied into our daily interaction with others anywhere and in every situations except if we're dealing other than human beings.

As the author explained :
1. People are more complicated.
2. People are aware.
3. People think for themselves.
4. People certainly do not want to be manipulated by others.

Remember and respect those features will produce a good management skill.

One Minute Manager explained 3 key factors to become an effective manager :

1. One Minute Goal Setting

This is the foundation for one minute management. Write our goals on papers. One goal a sheet not more than 250 words of explanations. Read and re read it often to make sure our behaviours match our goals.

2. One Minute Praising

It helps people to reach their full potential. As a manager, it is adviceable to praise people when they do something right or if a person is a new learner, praise them when they did something approximately right and guide them until they are able to do it correctly without much guidance.

3. One Minute Reprimand

If a person have all the skills to do something right and he/she did not do the work accordingly, One Minute Reprimand will be given. Before giving reprimand, a manager have to see the behaviour himself. A manager cannot depend on what someone else saw. Never give a reprimand based on 'hearsay'.

I believe if we can apply them into our daily routine, we will be more productive, calmer and happier individual.

I also believe in writing down our own goals be it a yearly, monthly, weekly or daily basis. It makes us more focus on what we need to do especially with so many distractions and noises thrown into our path. When we can see clearly what our main focus are - when and where we will reach them, not only we would be a happier person but a calmer person as well. Because any distractions or noises lay in front of us, we can either skip, delay or ignore them altogether no matter how persistence they are.

According to the author, TOUCHING is a very honest and powerful message. People have strong feelings about being touched. We will know if somebody really care about us or just trying to manipulate us through touching. Touch people we care only when giving them something such as reassurance, support, encouragement etc.
                   

                       

                                8/10

#kakinota : the last lecture by randy pausch

The late Randy Pausch was a lecturer.

He passed away in 2008 due to cancer.

He left a wife, Jai Pausch and 3 children - Dylan, Logan and Chloe.

The last lecture was really Randy last lecture for his fellow students and friends at Carnegie Mellon University.

He recorded the lecture as a gift to his kids to show them how much he loved them and as a guidance for them in the future.

The book explained about his childhood dreams and how he worked hard to make it happened. He encouraged us not to give up ours. Never belittle or laugh other people dreams no matter how silly or illogical it sound to us. We never know what will happen in the future.

This is a person who taught us how to face the reality no matter how painful it is - acknowledged it and moved forward. He explained how he prepared his loved ones, mentally, emotionally and financially.

Through out the book and by watching his youtube, Randy didn't sound like a person who knew he had few months left to live. He was happy and healthy. I believed this was due to his upbringing. Randy was very very fortunate to have an enjoyable childhood. He was blessed with the coolest parents and a sister. That was why he had an amazing positive attitude toward life.

This is a book that contained answers to a question I've been reading in most human development books, "How would you spend  your day if today is your last day?"

I cannot say that everybody will accept their ill fated positively. I have seen person who cannot accept that he had few months to live and was very broken hearted and passed away. I cannot be prejudice why some people easily give up on life and their loved ones. I believed they have their own reasons.

I also met some people who fight their illnesses for their loved ones. Some of them do survived. Some do not and their loved ones let them go peacefully.

What ever it is, they left one valuable lesson for us to remember - never take anything in life for granted. You never know if today is going to be your last day alive?

Live well....


                         

                   

                               9/10

#kakinota : half girlfriend by chetan bhagat

It is about a guy meet girl love story.

Madhav Jha a guy from rural Dumroan, Bihar meet Riya Sumani from city Delhi at St. Stephen College.

Madhav fell in love with Riya but she wasn't interested to have serious relationship yet.

Madhav tried to talk to Riya to be his girlfriend but Riya refused. Tired with Madhav non stop nagging, she relented. She agreed to be his Half Girlfriend.

What is Half Girlfriend?

They have very closed relationship. They spend time together especially both are into basketball. They shared affectionate hugs. That's it. Nothing more.

Riya doesn't want to be pressured to do more. Madhav reluctantly agreed.

But one day, Madhav  said something unexpectedly due to peer pressure. Riya was so mad and left him.

When Madhav begged her few months later, Riya was getting married to her old friend, Rohan Chandak. She dropped out and moved to London.

Madhav was broken hearted. Finished his education. Refused a 50,000 a month job offer. Returned home to help his mom runs a private school, Dumraon Royal School.

They meet a few years later by accident. She was meeting a client. He was meeting Bill Gates Foundation representatives for being short listed for a small grant of USD20,000 for his school.

But... he needed to make a 5 to 10 minutes speech in English. Riya offered to help him with his speeches.

As a modern Indian woman and a divorcee who live in a traditional community, Riya faced difficulties especially Madhav's mother, who disapproved of their relationship. Not to worsen mother and son relationship, Riya ran away... again. She left a letter confessing that she was in final stages of cancer.

Madhav was so devastated. He vowed never to fall in love again. He dedicated his life to run his school and mother.

Everything changed when he received Riya's journals. With little assistance received from a well known author, Madhav embarked a journey to discover what had happened to Riya through out the years. He told the author that he will not give up and will find ways to do it until he'll get the answer.

I find the story is simple. Even though it lack the wow factor, it is interesting and enjoyable enough. The words are straight to the point. No flamboyant sentences or words. I believe readers will not be bored to read until the end.

I loved it.

     

                 

                              9/10

#kakinota : the ultimate gift by jim stovall

This book I like to call 2 in 1. Just like all things in life. 2 in 1 shampoo or 2 in 1 moisturisers etc.

It is a motivational in a story book. You'll enjoy the story plot and you'll get some inspirational or life guide notes too.

I believed it is to capture readers who want fast yet entertaining motivational facts. Sometime, the points are more easily absorbed into our mind and soul. Just like when we want to memorize something important by combining it into our favourite song.

I did that a lot. I memorized my school subjects with songs as my back ground. So when I want to recall certain facts, I remember the song and suddenly... wallah!

Okay.... This book is about a lawyer Mr. Theodore J. Hamilton and his faithful assistant Ms Margaret Hastings executed a will from the late Mr. Howard 'Red' Stevens.

Everybody in the family - the sons, daughter, in laws, out laws, relatives closed and far far away land received their entitlements except one.

The only person who, late Red Stevens supposed to hate, did not received any of Red Stevens properties............ yet.

Jason Steven 24 year old great nephew was fumed when he did not get his as easily as the rest of his family member.

And to make thing more interesting, his great uncle make him wait until next year with certain instructions for him to do under Mr Hamilton supervision.

He need to fulfill an elements within a month before he can open the next element in sequences.

Those are :

1. The Gift of Work
He who loves his work never labors.

2. The Gift of Money
Money is nothing more than a tool. It can be a force for good, a force for evil or simply be idle.

3. The Gift of Friends
It is a wealthy person, indeed who calculates riches not in gold but in friends.

4. The Gift of Learning
Education is a lifelong journey whose destination expands as you travel.

5. The Gift of Problems
Problems can only be avoided by exercising good judgement. Good judgement can only be gained by experiencing life's problems.

6. The Gift of Family
Some people are born into wonderful families. Others have to find or create them. Being a member of a family is a priceless privilege which costs nothing but love.

7. The Gift of Laughter
Laughter is a good medicine for the soul. Our world is desperately in need of more such medicine.

8. The Gift of Dreams
Faith is all that dreamers need to see into the future.

9. The Gift of Giving
The only way you can truly get more out of life for yourself is to give part of yourself away.

10. The Gift of Gratitude
In those times when we yearn to have more in our live, we should dwell on the things we already have. In doing so, we will often find that our lives are already full to overflowing.

11. The Gift of a Day
Life at its essence boils down to one day at a time. Today is the day! Plan how you would like the last day of your life.

12. The Gift of Love
Love is a treasure for which we can never pay. The only way we keep it is to give it away.

Readers will read how Jason completed his tasks until to the final element. It is how the author explained in details about each element of the ultimate gift. I believe all of them are equally important. It is what differentiate a good person than a bad one.

The 1st simple element we can try is The Gift of Gratitude. Once we wake up in the morning, before get out of bed, we should state 10 things we're grateful for. It need not be difficult. Just list out all simple things we had in our life. Things that we take granted all this while. Someone once said to me that things we take granted are usually free. Since they are free, we tend to overlook them. But once they are taken away, we cannot replace them.

The 2nd element we could give a try is The Gift of a Day. How would we spend our last day today? Remember.. tomorrow we will die. How and who we want to spend our last day in life. If we do this often, we can differentiate what is important in our life and what is to ignore.

Life will be less stressful if we can answer both questions truthfully. These 2 important questions are the basic element that teach us to focus our life more clearly

In the end, life lived to its fullest is its own ultimate gift.

                                   9/10

#kakinota : eat that frog! by brian tracy

21 Great Ways to Stop Procrastinating and Get More Done in Less Time.

As it is, the book explained 21 ways to achieved whatever we plan to do.

It means take ACTION NOW & FAST. Don' t  scumb to PROCRASTINATION and later we'll become scumbags.

I like it. I loved books which give guidance to readers to become a better person. When I read them, it got me thinking, "God! I can do this.". I feel motivated. My mind got me thinking more creatively even for a while.

The 21 greats ways are :

1. Set the table

2. Plan in advance daily

3. Rule 80/20 ( It got me thinking about Miranda Kerr philosophy - 80% healthy 20% fun)

4. Consider consequences

5.Practise creative procrastination. (I loved this one very much.)

6. Use ABCDE method

7. Focus on key result area

8. The Law of 3

9. Prepare throughly

10. Take 1 step a a time ( depends on situation, actually. Some situation need to be bulldoze forcefully to complete them)

11. Upgrade own skills (Strongly agreed)

12. Leverage your special talents

13. Identify your key constraints.

14. Put the pressure on yourself

15. Maximize your personal power

16. Motivate yourself into action

17. Get out of technological time sinks. (Strongly agreed)

18. Slice & dice the task ( depend on tasks actually)

19. Create large chunk of time ( I loved this too)

20. Develop a sense of urgency

21. Single handle the task.

There.... all 21 of them.

I am one of the procrastinator... I am.

I know that every morning I have this big ugly hateful 'frog' (task) to do but sometimes how I tackle them depend on my day.

The big ugly hateful 'frog' cannot be avoided. Even if I closed my eyes, deep in my heart, I know the frog still there. It is still there staring at me. Sometime it makes noises to irritate me. Then I have no choice but to face it and get it done with.

My way to overcome the big ugly hateful frog (task) is by forcing myself. I mentally talk to myself... I hate this frog (task)... I hate this frog (task)... so many times until the hateful and angry feelings overshadow that big ugly frog (task), grab it and swallow it force fully until I finish it. I will get all kind of feelings throughout the process - feel like crying and feel like vomiting but I just focus my mind and force myself to go through and get it done with. Only after I finished the process, I can proceed to the next task without feeling guilty or cheating.

If I try to cut and dice it smaller, I believed I will immediately stop on my second thoughts. I know I will.

That's how I eat my big ugly fat frog early in the morning... daily ( urghhh...)

Next....

10/10

#kakinota : scars by cheryl rainfield

It is a story about 15 year old Kendra Marshall.

She is a sexual abuse survivor.

The story explained how Kendra coping with the effect of abuse. How she tried to cope them by cutting herself. She sees them as a way to maintain her sanity when things become to hard for her.

The story explained how the abuse effected her relationship with her parents. How their concerns suffocated her. How she feel her mother never listened to her even from the beginning. And indirectly she blamed her for her ignorant.

Kendra feels closer to her therapist, Carolyn Fairchild. Carolyn is more of a mom to her than her own mother. Carolyn understand her. Carolyn never pushed her. Carolyn sincerely concerned about her well being.

She also find solace with Sandy and Mrs Archer. These people understand, appreciate and encourage her to do her paintings. Something that comes from her inner self even if most of her painting seems raw and scary to others.

She find true relationship with Meghan, who promised will not betray her when thing get tough and not afraid of being different.

I read a lot of books about sexual abuse. Maybe to others, these stories were fictional but I believe in them. Maybe the characters are fictional but normally the stories were from real life sources.

I also read some books about a survivor of human trafficking. The stories had me so traumatised up until today. Every time when there are news about missing people especially women or children, it got me thinking about those books.

Not every person could survive from the abuse, physical or sexual, even with the help from people around them.

It takes a long time and a lot of effort to heal the unseen scars. Only few of them who strongly enough to survive the unfinished abuse but most of them drifted further into the in depth of the abused left behind by the abuser.

                           

                         

10/10

#kakinota : the obstacle is the way - ryan holiday

The Timeless Art of Turning Trials into Triumph.

The book taught us how to acknowledge obstacles in our life. To embrace it. And to turn it into something that will help and guide us towards our goals.

The author gave a lot of well known personalities as examples people who change their obstacles into triumphs.

Through his extensive research , the author explained how each of them worked very hard and persistent to overturn their problems into something great.

What I find the most endearing was when he advice readers to :
1. Hard work
2. Honesty
3. Helping others as best we can.

I have mentioned before that my late father also emphasised the same advice which I held dearly in my heart.

1. Lead life with honesty and integrity
2. Giving your best in everything you do
3. Never ever ever do bad thing to others
4. Adaptability

Then whatever life put you through, you will be fine. Universe will show you the way out somehow.

And he didn't even read Mr Holiday book.

He didn't have high education to know it.

                 

  " This too shall pass."  -  Abraham Lincoln.

                             10/10

# kakinota : lullabies - lang leav

I have high expectation from Ms Leav.

I read her first book - love and misadventure.

I loved it.

And when I saw her second version, I'm so excited.

But sadly the book is not as good as I expected it to be.

The stories in between were longer and I couldn't understand what and how they correlated with each other.

Furthermore the poems were not as good as the first version. Even if it is just for light reading, I wouldn't recommend it. After I read it a loud, the whole book sound like a sad book which make the whole reading experience confused and depressed.

It was different experience altogether with her first version which  make me feel excited and happy as a lot of the poems sound funny and cheeky.


                   

               

                           4/10

#kakinota : think big by ben carson

                                 

                                                 

Dr Ben Carson is a well known and respected person in States and in medical arena through out the world.

But for me, who is in a far far away land, I don't know who Dr Ben Carson is. 

I just read it. I never heard his name before. Never watched his movie. Never read his other book.

Firstly, his book is full with medical jargon unless Dr Ben explained it in layman terms, are quite confusing.

I would like to emphasised that I really really really admire and respect his mom. I believed her strong influence in her sons' life is what shape them today - successful and respected person.

I personally liked her famous quote :

"You can do anything they can do - only you must try to do it better."

Dr Carson wrote about his childhood until he started his medical career. He thanked all persons involved in helping him through out his life.

Dr Carson strongly believed that reading is the utmost important attitude we needed to ingrain into ourselves, our children, our community and our country to make world a better place.

Knowledge not only open our mind, it also open many doors of opportunities. 

Knowledge help improve Dr Carson life tremendously -  from poverty to become one of the best expert in the medical world.

Dr Carson encouraged his readers to try our best in any chosen field and always trust in GOD. 

He explained :

T - Talent

H - Honesty

 I  - Insight

N - Nice

K - Knowledge

B - Books

 I - In-depth knowledge

G - GOD

Recently I once read a survey done by a well known company here (not US or EU) which result shown that :

"The rich read more books and spend less time watching tv. The reading habit seems strongly correlated with household income. Either the rich have more time to read or 

they are richer because they read more."

I believed this is what Dr Carson's mom observed while working in those wealthy families.

                                  10/10

#kakinota : adultery by paulo coelho

I really like Paulo Coelho.

Read some of his books.

I find that his story plot is simple.

Adultery is about an inner conflict of a woman.

Linda has a perfect life - loving and successful hubby, great career in one of the established company in Switzerland, 2 lovely children and a very comfortable life.

In fact her life is too perfect and too comfortable until the life itself suffocated her.

She couldn't find the meaning in her everyday daily routines. She asked herself if this is the only life she has to go through until the end.

Everything changed when she interviewed a 'respected' politician who was her ex-high school boyfriend, Jacob König.

Linda and Jacob rekindled their relationship as an attempt to create spark in their supposed 'normal' life.

When Linda realised the truth of what 'normal and perfect' life is all about, guilt make her face the hard reality and sacrifices need to be done.

"Life offers us thousand of opportunities for learning. Every man and every woman, in everyday of our lives, always has a good opportunity to surrender to LOVE. Life is not a long vacation but a constant learning process." - Paulo Coelho.

             

9/10

#kakinota : quiet by susan cain

The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking.

I love this book very very very much. I believe this book is a must read book especially for persons who dealing with people.

I also believe every parents should read it. Teachers too. Because if we can recognize the different between an introvert and extrovert at the earliest stages of growing, we can give guidances and supports accordingly.

I'm not talking based on this book only or any other books I read through out my growing up life. I'm talking based on my own experiences.

The topic is very dear to me and that's why it took me sometimes to finish it. I had to pause and reflected every moments of my growing ups. It makes sense to me now. I feel that every jumbles I've been through before fall into their places which I've couldn't justified to myself why I reacted that way or this way when situations became too intense for me at that point of time . I just followed my instincts.

I feel so relieved. It is good to know that a lot of people out there are introvert and some of us are very successful in their field too.

According to the famous Carl Jung in his book, Psychological Types (1921) :

- introverts are drawn to the inner world of        thoughts and feelings.
- extroverts are drawn to external life of           people and activities.
- introverts focus on the meaning they make   of the events swirling around them.
- extroverts plunge into the events                      themselves.
- introverts recharge their batteries by being   alone.
- extroverts need to recharge when they           don't socialize enough.

This book explained further in details and through few researches that :

Introverts and extroverts differ in the level of outside stimulations.

Introverts feel recharge in less stimulation and vice versa.

Introverts not necessarily shy. Shyness is the fear of social disapproval or humiliation, while introversion is a preference for environments that are not overstimulating.

There are shy extrovert or non-shy introvert.

Introverts and extroverts able to stretch their personalities but only up to a point.

Introverts are capable of acting like extroverts for the sake of work they consider important, people they love or anything they value highly.

Introverts often have one or two deep interests that are not necessarily shared by their peers.

Dr Kenneth Rubin, Director of Centre for Children, Relationship and Culture at the University of Maryland, US writes :

"If you're consistent in helping your child learn to regulate his or her emotions and behaviours in soothing and supportive ways, something rather magical will begin to happen. He/she is learning to self regulate fearfulness and wariness."

"If you call her "shy", she'll believe the label and experience her nervousness as a fixed trait rather than emotion she can control. She also knows full well that "shy" is a negative word in our society. And above all, do not shame her for her shyness."

These... I agreed STRONGLY.

And I thank God every day until the rest of my life that I have a very supportive and loving parents. Their unconditional love helps me go through my darkest moments of my life in finding out "Why am I different?".

10/10

#kakinota : the fault in our stars by john green

Normally I would stay away from sad novels.

Because they give me emotional distress.

After completed them, it take me few days to flush out the feelings.

Because my mind wouldn't stop asking.

If possible I want to re-write the whole story again which end with happy ending.

I love happily ever after.

I really do.... but I read those books anyway.

The exceptionally good one.

Because it reminds me what life is all about.

The ups and downs.

The fortunates and unfortunates.

It makes me realises how people cope when facing difficulties - be it in love life, marriages, health...

"Grief does not change you, it reveals you."

This story is about a 16 year old teenage girl, Hazel Grace Lancaster, a lung cancer survivor.

She met Augustus Waters 17 year old, an osteosarcoma cancer survivor in one of her weekly Support Group meetings.

Their friendship blossom into something beautiful. They embarked into a journey to find the author, Peter Van Houten who wrote their favourite book - An Imperial Affliction, also about a cancer patient who died, just because Hazel wanted to know what happened to the other characters in that book.

Gus, as he fondly called, used his WISH to get both of them (including her mom) to go to Amsterdam for the meeting.

It turns out that Mr Van Houten was not what they imagined of. Instead he was an alcoholic douchebag.

Instead of letting Hazel sulking about it, Gus convinced her that their journey will not be wasted. They are going to create beautiful memories out of it. And it turn out to be their most memorable memories that Hazel will treasure for the rest of her life.

"You don't get to choose if you get hurt in this world, but you do have some say in who hurts you." - John Green.
   
                                           10/10

#kakinota : the do-over by m.k schiller

It is a funny story between Kyle Manchester, a top notch journalist and Lanie Carmichael, a lawyer.

They meet by an arranged date by his best friend Brad Jansen, who is a lawyer working in a same firm as Lanie.

Brad was dating Lanie's sister, Cassie.
Brad arranged the meeting out of pity that Lanie did not have any dates before.

But at the same time Lanie is using Kyle to get closer to Brad as she was in love with Brad for a while.

To get Kyle agree to her term and conditions, Lanie offered Kyle a high profile story that will earned him a road to Pulitzer.

Even though he disagree at first and Lanie's being a good lawyer herself, he eventually agree to help her to do the do-over.

Brad stated few of his terms and conditions, being the first, "Do not fell in love with me".

But as they get along well through out the do-over processes, it seems that one of them was about to break the golden rule or maybe both of them did.

They however found out the truth of each other skeletons, why the became the person they are today.

                                   8/10

#kakinota : the tools by phil stutz and barry michels

Phil Stutz (psychiatrist) & Barry Michels (law practitioner turn psychotherapist) introduced 5 life-changing techniques to become a better version of ourselves.

The book guide us on how to overcome our own demons and to move forward in life.

The 5 tools are :-

Tool 1 -
Reversal of Desire.
How to overcome our fear of pain (failure). What steps needed for us to do to overcome them and reach out the vast opportunities lay in front of PAIN.

To me the failures were not so scary. I know everybody fails. Failure is part of success. It's either I feel embarrassed, demotivated or angry. Sometimes I just laughed at it or maybe I cried for few days or weeks or months. Until no more tears.Then came the scariest part. THE PICK-YOURSELF-UP JOURNEY. I don't know how long it's going be. Am I strong enough? Or am I going to give up easily? Am I ready to know that maybe my loved ones won't be with me throughout the long journey any more. Am I ready for that too? I don't know.

Tool 2 -

Active Love
To change from resentment to love.
When we face harsh situation with another person, sometimes we will become angry. So whenever we face with this difficulties, it is our choice whether we want to remain angry (the Maze) or we use Active Love approach.

This approach teaches us to accept all ideas including the ones that offend us most. Then we use the Active Love approach such as by telling ourselves we forgive them and feel the Outflow of energy(love)  from deep in our heart.

Tool 3 -

Inner Authority
Find confidence and inner strength
Sometime when we face an overwhelming task for example public speaking, our brain and body freeze. According to the authors, freezing actually  caused by an inner insecurity that we didn't want others to know.

To overcome this, we need to acknowledge our inner self that we're deeply ashamed of.
 When we're in harmony with our inner self,  it will give us a deep inner strength. We know who we really are. We are less concern with other people opinions.

I came from not well to do family. I was once feel ashamed and tried to hide it. The more I tried to hide my insecurities, the more I became restless. There was no peace of mind. I was afraid that one day people will know the truth. I tried to emulate others just to be accepted until one day my inner shadow won the battle between us. Through experiences and maturity, I found what I was looking for.- an inner peace mind and soul.

Tool 4 -

The Grateful Flow.
For peace of mind. When our mind full with negativities, we have been taken over by Black Cloud. To push away this black cloud, we need to inject into our mind some positivities. GRATEFULNESS is very important element in our life. We are so busy looking for something to make us happy until we forget the one we had. All the grateful things were given free and that's why we take it for granted. But once it's taken from us, we cannot get it back. Things like our health, able bodied, sound mind and love.

So the authors suggest that we state at least 5 things we're truly grateful for. Say it loud so we can hear ourselves. Say it slowly so we can feel the grateful flow from our deepest heart to outside. And do as often as we can until we truly mean every single things we say we're grateful for.

Tool 5 -

Jeopardy
Immense willpower.
The authors want us to use our creativity. Imagine ourselves in the future on our own DEATHBED. See our old selves raise and saying something to our present selves. What would that be? Do our old selves congratulate us or angry to us for what we have done or haven't done. Do our old selves praise us or berated us?


But for myself the most profound quotes is

That should remind us not to waste our precious life unwisely.

The tools doesn't end with the chapter. It is an ongoing process in our life.

"No matter how demoralized or lazy you are, if you're alive and conscious, you have enough energy to make some tiny effort on your own behalf even the most minuscule effort counts. The only real mistakes is to do nothing."

                            10/10

#kakinota : the unlikely pilgrimage of harold fry by rachel joyce

The story is about a 65 years old retiree named Harold Fry who received a letter from his colleague, Queenie Hennessy after 20 years of her disappearance.

In the letter, Queenie explained she had cancer and was going to die. The letter stated that she has no other family member or relatives to inform about it. She sent it to Harold as a rememberence of their good friendship once upon a time.

Harold felt deeply touched with it as they were once working at the same place and he did not know the reasons of her sudden termination. He wrote a reply letter and with intention of going to post the letter to Queenie.

From a simple intention of posting a letter from one letter box to another, he suddenly got an idea to walk and gave his letter personally to Queenie. He then informed the caretaker to give his message and he wanted her to stay alive until he reached her. His walking became an amazing self-discovery journey from Kingsbridge to St. Bernadine's Hospice, Berwick-upon-Tweed.

Through out the journey, Harold met a lot of people who were willing to help a stranger like him without wanting anything in returned, humble him. To Harold, all of these people were different but none struck as strange.

In the moment of solitary, Harold reminisced all things that went wrong in his life - his runaway mother, his troubled father who chased him out of his house when he reached 16, the first time he met his wife, Maureen and how they fell apart and became strangers living in the same house. He remember his son, David, whom he loved so much but unable to express his love to him and they then became estranged too.

He also remember how he met Queenie and they became closed friend. How out of sudden, Queenie disappeared. He felt guilty for not seeking her and asked her what actually happened that night.

It is not only an emotional journey for Harold but it is an emotional journey for Maureen too. How she took for granted and blamed Harold fir everything that had happened in her life. She blamed Harold for his cold treatment to their son, David. And from a good David turn out to be a bad one. How she ignored David's lack of interest in education. She pretended not knowing when David stole her money to feed his addiction. She just blamed everything to Harold. That put a deep strain into their marriage. They became strangers.

Eighty-seven days after setting out to post a letter, Harold Fry arrived at the gate of St. Bernadine's Hospice. Including mistakes and diversions, his journey had amounted to 627 miles. Together with his wife who had waited him at the end of the journey, they visited Queenie at the Hospice.

It is a good story. One need to read to find the answers to what actually happened to David and Queenie.

                                   8/10

#kakinota : how to get from where you are to where you want to be by jack canfield

The best book ever.

That's the only testimony I can give.

It's a motivational book written by the author of world famous Chicken Soup for Soul series.

I knew about those series but I did not read any of the collections. Yet...

I love the cover. Red with big bold written topic. It's quite catchy.

But the content is so so so good. It can be read by anybody. The author explained to the readers step by step how to implement his suggestions which are actually not very hard to follow by. In fact we can insert some of the suggestions into our schedules (if we want too) without changing our daily routines.

It is one of those books where I am proud to say it's worth to read and reread it over and over again. I can read it when I need a push of motivation. I can read it for leisure. And I can read it to maintain my motivation momentum.

The suggestions were proven before and will do so if anyone have the persistence and determination to improve ourselves.

It's worth the money, time and effort spend.

I assure you.

(10/10)

#kakinota : the alchemist by paulo coelho

This novel is about a shepherd named Santiago who follows his dreams.

One night while he was sleeping, he dreamt for the second times about a child who said to him that if he go to pyramids, he will find a hidden treasure. He went to see a Gypsy lady who explained to him the meaning of his dream with a price - she wanted 1/10 of his treasures.

Unfortunately, her explanation didn't get him far until he meet the King of Salem, Melchizedek who urged him to sell his flock and travel to the said  place to find a hidden treasure.

Along the journey, the shepherd faced difficulties which made him almost abandon his dream.

Through out his travel from Andalusia - Tangiers - Desert - Egypt, the boy befriended a lot of people who helped and taught him about the miracle of life. A friend explained to him not to worry much about the future. Feel the thrill of not knowing what the outcome would be. His friend explained  that the future was already written by God and what He had written was always for the good of man. Thus man live only for the present because present was full of surprises and man had to be aware of many things in the present too.

The boy also learn how to make adjustment along the way in the dessert without compromising his goal. He remember the king advised,

"When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it."

The novel can be considered as part of motivational book too as it explained indirectly about how people with dreams do not give up easily. We can learn a lot from nature flexibilities when facing adversities in our way achieving goals.

(9/10)

kakinota #the avery shaw experiment by kelly oram

A teen fiction and a funny one.

It is about 16 years old teenager Avery Shaw who is a junior in Spanish Fork, Utah being dump by her boyfriend, Aiden Kennedy.

So being a nerd person, she tried to heal her heartbreak with science.

Since she's not only being dump as a girlfriend, she also being dump as a science partner by her ex.

Despite her broken hearted, she suddenly found a way to heal and at the same time still able to enter 2013 Utah State Science Fair without her ex.

To make her research more interesting, she roped in her ex's brother, Grayson Kennedy. Not only Grayson will assist her as an independent adviser, she also help him to improve his school marks so he will be able to continue to play his sports game and be able to attend UVU later.

These are the commonly accepted 7 stages of grief :
1. Shock/disbelief
2. Denial
3. Bargaining
4. Guilt
5. Anger
6. Depression
7. Acceptance/grief

Readers will read through all the 7 stages and how Avery overcome every stage before she can move to another until at the end of it and move forward in her life.

"Facing the cause of grief is necessary in order to obtain acceptance. People don't forget the loved ones they lose. They make peace with them being gone. In order to get over broken heart, we have to make peace with the person who broke it." Kelly Oram.

kakinota #don't look back by jennifer l. armentrout

This is a thriller and mysteries book.

A girl who had been in an awful accident which left her having amnesia.
She couldn't remember her own name, her family and friends and couldn't even remember what had happened to her.

When Samantha Jo Franco 17 year old being accused of murdering her best friend Cassie Winchester, she knew she need to do something to make her remember what truly happened the night they went missing.

Along the way of trying to discover the truth of what happened that night, she also discovered what kind of person she used to be and the kind of people she befriended before the incident.

Sammy determined not only to find the murderer but also she determined to make amend with people she made enemies before especially with her childhood best friend.

Who is the murderer? At the end of the thriller, I found out that the person I suspected to be was the wrong person.

The book is actually simple and straight to the point and I found it to be entertaining for leisure reading.

psst : It took me 2 days to finish it including less sleep. I couldn't wait to know who was the murderer. A.S.A.P.

kakinota : Enjoying the Chase by Kristy Moseley

I've known the author from the famous wattpad. This story was among the highest readers and voters then. So were her other stories that managed to attract publisher to publish them as well.

This book is a story about boy meet girl. The guy S.W.A.T Officer Nate Peters meet a single mother, Rosie York through their own respective bestfriends. This book explains in detail about Nate's inner feeling when he try to win Rosie and her son DJ's love and trust .

80% of the story came from Nate's P.O.V (point of view) and the rest was Rosie's which is refreshing because usually when it comes to love and romance fictions, I usually find them were written from girls' P.O.V. How a woman/lady/girl try to find ways to be different from the bimbos and be noticed while mostly of the guy were seen as the coolest, toughest and hottest guy who do not have any internal conflict at all.

The story was long and it took me more than 2 days to finish reading. It is fine by the way because I feel that this story is lack of an 'ummph' factor. There is no urgency feeling to know what happened next as I can figure out more or less of what will happen next.

And the author loooove to used the word 'HOT' - the hot guy, the hot girl and the hot body until I felt 'HOTLY' annoying reading and reread it throughout the story.

kakinota : to sell is human by daniel pink

The beginning part of this book is quite boring. It explained about all the researches and outcomes done by the author and other group of researchers. Actually it is important because the author wanted to give some proven proofs before he went on to the solutions and conclusions part ( the 2nd section) which I find it interestingly useful and can be used in our daily communication with others too.

The result of all the tests done explained the difference between an extrovert (loud & pushy) and an introvert (shy & timid) as known by public but findings also found the 3rd personality - AN AMBIVERT which consist some traits of an introvert and some from an extrovert. In simple terms - an ambivert know when to speak up and when to shut up. It is considered as a PERFECT traits not only in sales but as a whole person too. Interesting!

According to Jim Collins, a well known author, a great way to start a friendly and
comfortable conversation is by asking
" Where are you from? " rather than " What do you do? " which sometimes considered as rude for certain cultures.

I personally loved the 3 step of essential rules :

1. Amazing Silence
    which taught us to wait for 15 sec before
    giving our thoughts. The 15 sec silence
    give us enough time to process infos
    we heard and think for the suitable
    answers especially if received negative
     infos about oneself.

2. "Yes and ..."
     A conversation begins with " Yes and .."
     will likely turn into more friendly
     discussion rather than " Yes but ... "
     which sometimes seen as a start for
     more negative outcome.

3. Make your partner look good.
     This require a lot of positive traits in a
     person to do this kindly act. In this world
     well known as "dog eat dog world",
     everyone doing their best to outsmart
     one another. With all the reality shows
     showing that people can and will do
     whatever it take to been seen as winner.
     It is quite refreshing to meet someone
     that is totally different from the rest.


                 

   
   
   
     

kakinota : Three weeks with my brother by nicholas & micah sparks

I have this love-hate relationship with nicholas sparks. I loved his books just like any of his fans but I hated the heartbreaking ending. I've read some books with sad ending before but his books were heartbreaking sad.

I read Night at Rodanthe and I... cried. I just can't believe it ended that way but I think life just don' t filled with happy endings only. I can say that the book make me traumatized with the author. When I saw his books and feel tempted to read, my heart will say " Nope... not going to go through THAT again". Not even the movies too.

But I do loved their memoirs though. I loved reading about their life experiences and how they overcome adversities (toughest one) The higher their successes the higher the sacrifices they had to endure. How their persistence in achieving their dreams to become millionaire and not to be poor ever again.

In every places they went, I searched for the exact photos so I could understand the whole story better.

But what touched me the most is their childhood memories. How they grew up. The sibling rivalry. The closed relationship among family members. And I did cried...... again when I read about Dana.

At the end of the book, not only I admired their inner strength but the way they've been supportive to each other and will do so until the end.Kudos to them. Kudos to their parents too.

kakinota: love & misadventure by lang leav

I stumbled this book while reading a newspaper. It suddenly become the no. 1 seller book for Malaysian readers.

Naturally I was curious to know about it and went to look for it. The book is quite simple for me who use to read books which have more than 250 pages if you cramp all the wording though.

I have to read and reread again and again since this is the first time I read poem book. I could not fully understand some of them but I do love the above poems. And I also do not understand the need of short stories in between those beautiful poems.

It is also suitable for light reader or any person who have limited English vocabulary since the English is quite simple.

I like to read it aloud so I can hear the beauty of the poems because some do sound funny and cheeky.

It is also a lovely reading for bedtime stories for kids too.

book review : without regret by r.l mathewson

It is about the other side of human world which is full with inhuman creatures, the goods and the baddies.

There are :-

Sentinels - half human and half angel. Guardian for human and keep the baddies such as vampires, shifters and demons at bay.

Pytes - an abomination by birth. From conception to 16 of age, they are vulnerable and at high risk of getting kill by other creatures. Once they transform, they become immortal and strongest and feared by every species on earth.

Vampires.

Shifters or warewolfs

Ramjis - demons who carried no scent, looked human, extremely rare, hated the human realm and 5x stronger than shifters.

The Sentinel and Pytes work together to fight the bad vampires, shifters and other demons from trying to take over their world and at the same time will take over the human world too.

For readers who like out of the world stories, is an okay book. If  not, don' waste time and money with it.